What about Tiananmen Square…?!? That was kinda cool for the CCP!
I wasn’t there but maybe someone here was.
Oh wait.
No.
They were all killed and then turned to mush by tanks repeatedly driving over the bodies and then hosed dune the drains.
GLORY TO THE CCP AND HOW WONDERFUL THEY ARE TO ALL THE PEOPLE.
What’s with the spam lately? I dislike authoritarianism as much as the next guy but I’ve seen this same exact comment copy pasted across multiple posts. Am I missing something here?
I’ve never been able to ride a bike without at least one hand on the handlebars.
I remember a teacher talking about the physics of how a bike stays up while riding it with no hands. I thought he was joking
It depends on the bicycle. I can do it on some, and not on others. I think it depends on the angle of the steering fork and also the center of balance of the handlebars.
It definitely depends on the bike. I had a mountain bike with big, fat, tires, and I could never ride it without hands. I also have a road bike with super skinny tires that I can ride no handed confidently enough that I can carry grocery bags in each hand while biking no handed around town.
How is this basic?
Most people in my country can do it.
I’ll never lead a nation with a microphone, a microphone
Whistle.
Tell right from left without thinking about it.
Read a map, unless it’s oriented the way I am facing. My mind will not flip it.
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Me and my dad are the same, on the left and right problem, never knew anyone else that had that problem, or that it had a name! I thought we were just weirdos :p
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I get that. My intuition often mixes both up, too.
That’s why I trained myself to say “driver-side” and “passenger-side” in my head when left or right come up. To a point where I don’t even have to think about thinking about it. I just visualize which side of car is meant instead of the rather abstract concept of left and right
Might not help you; but it helps me
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Well, my brain seems to be affected by it according to that test (difference score of 11) if I interpret the scale correctly
But well, I also got autism and quite a few other mental conditions and learned all my life to cope quite well with all my disabilities; that’s why I specifically outsource direction question to a visualization that make the answer more tangible for me than listening to my intuition.
But well, what works for some doesn’t necessarily work for all. And probably my other conditions have some influence on it as well. We’re all different, after all; even if sharing a few traits.
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They sit on different sides in different countries though… You are lost on another country
I believe it’s your brain but that’s not mutually exclusive from dumb.
Not me but my partner is 36 yrs old and can’t swim.
Once I saved a chinese guy from drowning, he was struggling to get back up on his pedalo, where his umbrella-carrying lady was watching us struggle in the river, him frantically gripping the side of the boat like a frog, me with my foot on his ass, pushing him with all my might. They were both obviously embarrassed, neither realizing the dude was 1mn away from exhaustion
I figure, if I hadn’t done that, maybe the situation in Taiwan would be different
What’s a pedalo?
Hmmmm… Pedal boat or paddle boat, says wikipedia. Sorry I did not realize this might not translate. Usually two seats, leg-powered
Shut the fuck up
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Bruh, I’m a fat fuck and not only did I get laid, I married a beautiful, wonderful woman half my weight. A amazing woman who loves me for who I am and finds me sexually attractive.
Be kind, be generous, ask questions, and do basic like, grooming and bathing and whatnot. If you’re socially awkward, study the ways of the Chandler. (Not necessarily literally, but honestly you can learn a lot about being pleasant to be around and interacting with people by watching actors fake it, which you can then use to fake it until you’re more comfortable).
Sex itself isn’t the goal, becoming a well-rounded person you would like to be around is the goal. Because self-confidence is an elusive but important factor.
I’m not going to claim to be without privilege, I’ve got a damn sexy voice and I sing in a chorus, which is a great way to meet people. Which is another part of my advice, find hobbies that let you interact with other people. They don’t even need to be people you’re sexually attracted to, because time with people helps you to be better around people, and being better around people helps those people to introduce you to others.
If it’s honestly something you want, becoming the kind of person who fucks is a very attainable goal. After all, our entire species is here because lots of people achieve that goal.
But like I said, it’s important for your aim not to be getting laid, but rather genuinely getting yourself to a place where you like yourself and know others will like you, too. Journey before destination, you know? It’s really really easy to wallow and pretend it’s outside your abilities, but that’s true of anything that you have never done before. And literally everything you do is something you can get better at.
Don’t give up, don’t despair.
Who the fuck Is Chandler?
Also I’m sorry but you’re basically telling me to fake myself. I cannot do that, it literally makes me sick in my stomach trying to “fit in” I have 0 desire of having another worthless hobby just to be more desirable… It doesn’t feel genuine, already dropped a few of those that I HAD the will to do, imagine a hobby that I don’t a give a shit about it how good that would go
Buddy, your account is 10 hours old and all you’ve contributed is negativity. I’m not surprised you can’t get laid, your attitude is bad and you seem like an unpleasant person based off the tone of your comments.
Nobody likes someone that’s perpetually angry. Buddy’s advice to you basically boiled down to “be yourself and be a genuinely kind person” and you just straight up dismiss it as “faking it”. If you have to fake being nice then you should get some help.
The guy suggested that practicing basic hygiene is ‘faking it’ and trying to ‘fit in’.
I don’t want to use the words ‘lost cause’ but I’m getting close.
Who the fuck Is Chandler?
Chandler Bing, the sarcastic “nerd” in Friends (who, like every sitcom character, is actually highly attractive of course).
Not saying you need to watch Friends (it hasn’t aged super well), but honestly sitcoms can be helpful for social training. To some extent, anyway.
Also I’m sorry but you’re basically telling me to fake myself.
No, I’m suggesting you find way to change things you don’t like about yourself, to make improvements. You’re going to feel like you’re faking it any time you try to do something you aren’t comfortable with at first, but the more you do it the more comfortable you’ll feel.
I cannot do that, it literally makes me sick in my stomach trying to “fit in”
Not telling you to try to fit in. I’m telling you to try to improve your interpersonal skills. Trying to fit in is trying to copy everyone else and be what you think they want you to be. Instead, try examine the way other people interact to learn how to be less awkward.
You won’t succeed immediately. You will make a fool of yourself. I spent decades making a fool of myself. Still do make a fool of myself. But that’s okay. The only real cost are the frustratingly intrusive memories of embarrassment. 😅 But hey, that’s how we learn.
I have 0 desire of having another worthless hobby
Who said anything about worthless hobbies? I’m confident there are things you’ve never tried that you would enjoy. If you don’t like it, find something else. Branch out. Spend time around people, that’s the important part. Not just for getting laid, but for like, longevity. Humans who have consistent social connections live longer on average.
Look, I’m not making demands of you here. I’m trying to give you advice that worked for me. If you don’t want that advice, just ignore it. But you remind me of my own attitude when I was younger, and I’m just letting you know what helped me.
I am significantly happier now than I was twenty years ago. But it’s not like I’ve reached some end point, change is the only constant. Improving myself is something I will probably never stop doing. Lately it’s been about learning to be a better partner to my wife, but it’s also still always about learning to be more comfortable outside my comfort zones. A lifelong, ongoing process. Like I said, journey before destination.
If left to my own devices, I would spend most evenings smoking weed, playing video games, and listening to podcasts or TV. Activities I love. But if that were all I did (or, rather, when that was all I did), I would (did) enjoy my life far less.
Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t easy. A line from the TV show Scrubs that has stuck with me for years goes “nothing in life worth having comes easy.” I don’t know if I entirely agree with this line, but there is absolutely some truth to it. Every day we choose between the pain of effort and the pain of regret.
Anyway, I don’t want to be annoying. I hope you find what you’re looking for in life, dude.
Just wanted to say that both of your replies are great comments, they’re both useful and positive, love seeing comments like yours. They’re well thought out replies!
People like you help to give me back some of my faith in humanity.
It’s great that you’re taking that other guy to heart.
No you have to be genuine
Be kind, be generous, ask questions, and do basic like, grooming and bathing and whatnot.
He is basically telling you to be nice to others. To work on yourself to become a better person. Something we all are supposed to be doing and most of us are doing. And sometimes, when you don’t feel like it, to be nice to others anyways. That’s just basic human decency and interaction.
Nobody is telling you to fake yourself. But we all sometimes are feeling like behaving like an asshole, but then we don’t.
Basically, work on yourself to become a person others like to be around and don’t be an asshole.
navigate the social landscape of a corporate office
Oooof, I hear that. Things are more political than ever at my work and it’s like, I just want to do my job and go home
I can’t navigate politics at all. Have done ok working at startups though, some offices are not at all political. Where I work, we can fix other people’s processes if we think of a better way, we work with other departments, I don’t have to go through my manager to talk to your manager to get to you, can go directly to you. Can talk to the CEO, to ex- employees, nobody is protective of their work, nobody is angling for my job.
Everyone in my office just fucking moans about everything, all the time. It’s honestly exhausting. The company is actually really good and gives a ton of perks. Just do your job and go home. Stop trying to bring everyone down with your shit.
The rules are “make anyone above you feel good about themselves because they’ll throw a hissy fit if you don’t make them feel special.” It’s pathetic and I’m tired of it.
But like if I try this, if I break down and try this, I’m so bad at it that it’s insulting and threatening to them to see my transparent flattery and wheedling.
Two things at once.
There’s two ways to really do two things at once. Either you find a way to make them one more complex thing in your mind, or you juggle your focus between them.
This is good for things like reading aloud, reading music, playing two rhythms with different limbs, dancing or other choreography etc.
A great deal of studies have proven the latest conventional wisdom: multitasking is a myth.
If it takes you 5 minutes to focus on and complete task A and 10 minutes to focus on and complete task B, trying to do them both at the same time instead of completing one and then completing the other guarantees it will take you longer than 15 minutes.
It very much depends on the task. So long as the tasks don’t overlap, in cognitive requirements, you’re fine. E.g. you can listen to a podcast, while washing up. As soon as the requirements overlap, then your point holds. E.g. I personally can’t write anything down, while listening to an audiobook. The resource requirements overlap.
It’s also worth noting that different people can do the same task with different parts of the brain. E.g. accurate timekeeping. Some people do it visually, others audibly etc.
Well yes, was primarily referring to executive function. But even podcasts or really good music can start to sap our focus. If you lose focus for even just a moment, you’ll probably not make up that time.
I have ADHD myself, so my EF is screwed. I actually use audio books to keep my brain from stressing while doing dull tasks.
Diving. Thousands blown along multiple failed exams. Still get made fun of in my family and work due to that.
Given his luck, hopefully one or the other not both at once tbh
I can’t even think of an answer to this question.
Well congrats today is your day. You came up with an answer.
Burp - I just can’t do it. Also whistle or roll my Rs
That’s curious. Can you throw up though? What happens when you eat something that doesn’t agree with you and there is gas build up? Do you have a colic like horses (who can’t burb or throw up) do?
I have so many questions.
Lol I can throw up, but it’s super rare. Last time was when I had food poisoning about a year ago. I get nauseous sometimes but it usually passes. Just looked up horse colic and that sounds intense! Luckily it doesn’t cause me too much trouble other than bloating. I also stay away from carbonated drinks and straws to reduce the air I swallow.
I can’t burp either. Turns out my mom can’t. I wonder if it’s a genetic disability. Seriously, that may sound ridiculous but sometimes it’s really inconvenient!
Hi fellow no-burper! Everybody else in my family can burp, but maybe I just lost the recessive gene lottery? I totally agree, it’s one of those things that sounds like a small issue but really impacts my life sometimes.
I just can’t even right now or later. I don’t care if that makes me basic.
How odd.
I have no sense of direction. None.
I work in construction. If I show up to a site that is completely built, I get lost. If the floor is symmetrical in layout, I am totally screwed. It took me two full days on site once to get adjusted.
When assigned to a new site, if there are more than a few turns in a commute, I’m using the GPS to get there for a couple of weeks.
Also, I had no idea half of the people on this planet couldn’t whistle.
I have no sense of direction. None.
Sounds like you are a real-life Ryoga Hibiki.
Just curious: do you also lack the ability to visualize things in your mind? For example, I am able to bring up a road map of my city in my mind, figure out the most effective route between two points, and rotate that map in all three dimensions to “look” at it from all angles. My familiarity with the city layout and geography is the determining factor on how easily I can visualize that map. I can also do the same thing with large buildings and their internal layouts.
My wife, on the other hand, has a somewhat similar (but nowhere near as bad) sense of direction as you, and a commensurate inability to visualize objects in her mind. So while she can mentally visualize a soccer ball as a spherical object, she cannot even visualize the hexagonal pattern of pieces, much less (on a traditional soccer ball) how some are white and others black. She doesn’t technically have aphantasia, as she is still able to visualize to a small degree, but I have always suspected her inability to visualize effectively was directly connected to her inability to navigate effectively. She also relies heavily on GPS and maps when navigating anywhere else other than the town she was born in.
Not OP but I can visualize great, still have no sense of direction.
For what it’s worth, I can’t visualize either, but have excellent directional sense.
So maybe it is not related, then. Or maybe only causally related, or under certain more specific visualization deficits.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
You’ll probably have your answer when I tell you that when you brought three dimensions into the map analogy, my brain kind of melted.
Sounds like you’re describing my wife for real
Remember people’s names or faces
That’s actually a cognitive disorder called Prosopagnosia.
And welcome to the club - I had a stroke and while luckily all major deficits returned to normal with timely treatment, I developed prosopagnosia.
It’s fairly freaky at times. While it’s not my main job anymore I still work as a paramedic occasionally - and when I get a massive trauma at three o’clock in the morning I can hand it over in the ED to the full resus team with every detail without looking into my notes once. But if they ask me for a name I need an ID card or my notes.
Thanks, I’ve never been diagnosed or anything but it’s something I’ve had trouble with all my life, kind of just learned to be very wary about various social situations because I’d get it wrong a lot.
