That the Empire State Building is a restaurant named Empire Steak Building.

We live inside the earth. Dogs say barf.

I thought our eyes worked by projecting some kind of energy beam that scanned objects, like how Superman’s X-ray vision is sometimes drawn.

That encountering quick sand in real life was a real possibility every day.

Bonus: My kid doesn’t believe that Santa is magical, he just has really advanced technology.

That there were little gnomes inside the doors of the cars and that they were in charge of raising and lowering the windows, especially in the automatic cars.

Tigers are female lions.

Freddy Krueger was two people. I thought it was like Dr. Frankenstein and his monster. I thought it was Dr. Krueger and Freddy was the monster he created. When I saw the movie I was like where’s his creator, the one that brought him to life?

I thought every song on the radio was being performed live somewhere

That every time people had sex, the woman became pregnant. I thought that every sex scene in a film meant the film had to be stopped for 9 months until the actress could give birth.

I thought adults were smarter than me

Two that come to mind:

People would say that’s an “old timey” car or something and I thought that was a brand name.

I thought the people who had really tall spiky mohawks had hair that just grew like that.

Can I’ll cheat a little and use my teen years.
When let’s plays where the new hot thing, I thought a blind let’s play literally meant, eyes closed

That cats and dogs were the same animal, the cats were the girls and the dogs were the boys

I ran up to my mom once, completely serious and said, “Mom! I know why all fat people are short. They use up all their skin!”

I felt like a genius until she laughed so hard she fell on the floor and peed a little.

Actors are dying… for real.