Brand, thing, behavior, method, advice, mantra, etc.
I swear by Blackwing pencils.
Also, the ‘two minute rule’, which has really improved my life: “if it takes two minutes or less to do, just do it now; if it takes longer, schedule it.” I’ve got untreated attention issues and it’s very easy for me to notice something needing done, and overlook or procrastinate it because it seems inconvenient in the moment. Having a totally painless rule that forces me to acknowledge that thing I should pick up, that trash bag I should change, etc, or, to at least put on my calendar anything I mustn’t forget in the long run has been great for me.
Batman
A few years ago I read a post about self improvement where someone wrote about the concept of no-zero-days to form habits. It basically means you just need to do something meaningful every day to make it count, even if it’s something very small. Read one page in a book - no zero day, do 10k steps - no zero day…
Of all the things I read and tried in the past to change my behavior, get more active, learn new things etc, this by far worked the best for me and basically changed my life.
Right now I have 18 different habits I’m tracking on my phone. Things like reading, learning Spanish, doing chores, solving a puzzle on lichess, taking a cold shower, learning something about world affairs/history, taking care of my finances, meditating etc…
I don’t need to do all of them, one is enough. But because they require so little effort I quickly started to do more and developed habits I don’t need to force myself to do.
Now I have a 1500+ day streak on Duolingo and do 2-5 minutes of Spanish lessons every day. For more than 4 freaking years. This eventually ended up in visiting a language school in Spain last summer. One of my best vacations ever.
I read almost daily and found interest in new genres. I get enough exercise at least a few times a week. I educated myself about finances and now I don’t live paycheck to paycheck, paid off my debt and started to save something.
I later read about this concept in the book Atomic Habits and found variations of it in songs like Little Acorns by the White Stripes. In the end it’s about breaking things up into small, easy pieces so you don’t get overwhelmed or give up before you even start.
If anyone asks me what I swear by it’s this. It’s like magic.
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Thanks, I’ll check that out. Currently I’m using the app Loop Habit Tracker which is not perfect but has widgets for every single habit which I can check off directly on my home screen
Little Acorns! That was my first exposure to this concept. Could you tell me a little more about your experience starting out, and what sort of systems you use to help? Or point me in the direction of a post for further reading (would you recommend Atomic Habits?)? I’m overdue for a big change in my life and I’ve been thinking about how to approach things as someone terrible at following through, so this has me interested. I’m not quite sure where to start though.
I think the reason why it worked so well for me from the beginning is because I really focused on the no-zero aspect. Make that your goal. You say you are ready for a big change. Break that up into the tiniest pieces. Be like the squirrel. If you haven’t already, make today a no-zero. If reading is something you want your future self doing regularly, grab a book and read one page. Done. If you want to be more educated look something up on wikipedia that you heard on the news but have no concept of (today for me that was austerity). Done. I guess that’s the secret. 0.01 is not zero. It’s not the big change you have in mind but it’s easy and doable. And over time these things become part of your identity. In a few weeks you are someone who reads regularly. Or someone who eats healthy stuff regularly. It’s not something you dream about it’s already who you are, no matter how much it is. Start with a few tiny things so you have different options to make it a no-zero and make sure to check at least one of them every day. Extend that pool of habits over time if you find new areas you want to improve on.
It was also very helpful for me (at least for some habits) to not focus on certain actions but be a little more open. The 18 things I’m tracking in the app right now are represented by emojis. The house emoji means I do something in the household. Making my bed, doing the laundry, whatever. The credit card emoji means it’s about my finances. Putting some money to the side, investing in an ETF, reading something about budgeting… it gives me more options to check off that item and extends my habits over time.
And I think it’s important to be kind to yourself. I have a few things I aim for but don’t check off a lot. Like writing a journal. I don’t feel bad about it. I can come back to it later when other things have become more automatic. I still improve in other areas and that’s fine.
What I quickly stopped doing is tracking the ‘negative habits’ I see regularly in these apps. Like not watching netflix, not smoking, not eating junk food. In my opinion it’s way better to focus on the positives and more importantly it’s much easier. If I take a cold shower in the morning or do my Spanish lesson then that’s done. I’m already at no-zero and can focus on other things which is very rewarding.
Yes, I can recommend the book. It goes more into detail about how habits are formed and about tactics how you can make it easier to develop them.
But don’t wait for the book. Do the 0.01 today. One acorn at a time. Be like the squirrel.
Thank you. I really appreciate you taking the time to go into detail for me.
It’s not something you dream about it’s already who you are, no matter how much it is.
I like this a lot. I’ll be getting that book - but today’s my first official no-zero day. Thanks again, wish me luck in gathering these acorns.
You can boost it a bit by tracking a few things that made you happy that day.
No zero days + removing possessions that don’t bring you joy
Good point. I guess I have a lot of stuff I can get rid of, donate, sell. I’ll focus on that in the future
Fountain pens, good inks, and good paper.
The cost difference is so small, and the output is significantly better than anything I’ve ever written with a ballpoint.
Not to mention the enjoyment around the rituals and processes that go with.
It’s also better for your hands if you do a lot of writing! You’re not constantly applying pressure like you are with a ballpoint so your hands don’t get as tired
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“You are under no obligation to be the same person you were 5 minutes ago” - Alan Watts
This one is a bit hard-won for me. You see I used to be an asshole. It was my brand. I thought “it’s just in my nature”.
Fortunately, I was also a student of religion (mostly because I was a militant atheist. Know your enemy and all that). Studying Buddhism, I began to observe the nature of self. I found enough distance from it to see its transient nature.
I realized being an asshole was a choice and I could just as easily choose otherwise. Soon I began to discover this was true of most character traits.
I’m not saying you don’t have consistent patterns of behavior. I’ll hopefully always be curious and analytical. But for the most part, the way you conduct yourself and where you focus your attention is a choice.
So, if you’re not happy with who you are maybe don’t be so attached to the idea of 'who you are". And if that seems hard, observe what you pay your attention to and try to find the distance between observation and behavior. In that gap lies the choice you make, consciously or not, to be “you”.
No offense, brother, but this is a great example of my swear-by.
Don’t write a “wall of text.” Even if a reader is interested, it’s hard to read the whole thing.
Separate your wall into smaller sections, use bullet points (esp at work) if it helps.
Use small sentences. Forget what they told you about keeping similar ideas in one paragraph. You’re not Salinger, and no one is expecting you to be.
This is a digital age, and our job as not-salinger is to convey information.
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No offense taken
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These are salient points
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I edited my post
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I hope it’s easier to digest now
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Thank you for the constructive criticism
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Is your name Earl?
Etnies shoes. I will die with a pair of them on my feet. They’re the only ones that are comfortable, wear out in more than a few months, look generic enough to pair them with most of my clothes and are reasonably priced.
Your two minute rule is a lot like my rule where if I think of something I just do it now, or never do it at all! I don’t quantify the time it takes which can be problematic but it helps still.
I swear by Mitsubishi 9850 HB pencils. They are incredible.
I’m a pretentious black wing purist but I love writing the cold too much to resist a good recommendation. Might have to order a pack!
I write sheet music, doodle and diary a TON and I’ve been through the gauntlet of pencils. They are the absolute best I’ve ever tried
I too like fancy pencils. Mitsubishi’s range are my faves.
I just bought a dozen pencils from the Hi-Uni range and I’m super excited to try them out. I’ve heard so many good things about them from fellow pencil enthusiasts.
Zoflora cleaning products. All the ones like Fabulosa etc are just poor imitations. Zoflora have the best scents and cleaning power.
That, and a scrub daddy with the power paste. I can clean anything with those products.
Comparison is the thief of happiness.
I’ve found that by just focusing on what I have/can do and being content, I am generally very happy.
I agree completely. The original quote is, “Comparison is the thief of joy." ~ Theodore Roosevelt
If someone can’t explain how something works, they either don’t know how it works out don’t want you to know how it works.
Things can be complicated and have nuance, but there should be a general basic theory.
The thing is, sometimes you just can’t find the right words to explain it in a simple way. It happens to me all the time.
I usually forgive not knowing the right vocabulary as long as it is close enough.
Finding vocabulary at all can be a challenge in and of itself. If I get too lost for words I sometimes can’t find any - it’s not that I don’t know how things work, I don’t know how to say it.
I tend to explain stuff to myself to figure out if I think I got it. Sometimes I try explaining stuff on
redditand hope anyone corrects me if I’m wrong. Works great imho.
I have got a laundry list of quotes made by me. Let me put up some:
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You have to dream even before you start doing something
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Overbearing parenting is child abuse
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Do you want a lovely, smart, well-achieved, conversationally witty wife or not? If yes, first of all, go work on yourself
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The world’s not a fair place. So what are you going to do about it?
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Everything is learnable
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The power of greyskull
Are you Tyler? 🧐
My motto: if you do what you did, you get what you got.
It mostly serves to remind me (and my public, voluntarily or otherwise) that if you are unhappy with something and want it to change for the better, you’ll have to change parameters (i.e. your approach) or you will just get the same result.
